DarthFettDude607 Posted March 27, 2008 Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 I bumped into an old high school friend after my business math class today. He and I run into each other periodically, but he told me that he just HAD to IM me tonight to tell me about his trip to IHOP in honor of Dr. Seuss's "Horton Hears a Who". This is his rather "colorful" account of the events that transpired. ======== "Me and my friends decided that we had to try this stuff at IHOP ( www.ihop.com to see the Dr. Seuss items.) There are three items for this "Horton Hears a Who" movie: Candy Pancakes Jello Soda Green Eggs and Ham On our way in, my friend Alex commented, "God, I can already feel my tear ducts salivating." Little did we realize, he would be completely correct. We sat, and when the waitress approached and asked what we wanted, the four of us sang, "Candy paaancaaakes!" (see: Candy Mountain), and she gave us the most pitied look. At any rate... Green Eggs and Ham is pretty normal. The jello soda was actually pretty damn good for being jello cubes in soda. Candy pancakes... We were so excited. These are pancakes with chocolate and candy pieces inside, impaled on a lollipop, and drizzled with opaque blueberry and boysenberry syrup. Somewhere, Alex has a photo of Larry's last moment of happiness -- the moment before he ate the first pancake. It was terrible. It's like sugar cane kicked me in the balls, burned my house down, and raped my dog. We were gagging and screaming bloody murder in the restaurant, but nobody seemed to mind... Larry started crying, and every time Louis looked at his face, he began to dry heave. I had to run to the bathroom at one point because I was laughing so hard, and I couldn't swallow the pancake, so it began to moisten in the back of my gullet, intensifying in taste. As I sat back down at the table, Larry desperately reached for the jello soda which had once been so good to us, and took a large gulp. Then he screamed as if the candy pancakes had followed him home. Me, being stupid, and desperately wanting the taste of candy pancakes gone, also took a swig. It was like sugar cane had barred me from leaving my burning house, and had raped me up the ass in my final moments. I ran to the bathroom and puked in a toilet. The restaurant at this point was in riot because of us, mostly in laughter. Larry was still crying somewhere between sugar cane rape and laughter when I got back out. We paid for our meal, left a thirty dollar tip for the waitress and retreated." ======== So anyway, that having been said, what about you lot? Ever had any particularly nasty encounters with food or drink that you're willing to relive? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duckythemutant Posted March 27, 2008 Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 "Once, I bit into a strawberry, and spiders came out. I ran out of my grandma's backyard, spitting, screaming, and hating EVERYONE AND EVERYTHING." -Roy Blair Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rael0505 Posted March 27, 2008 Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 I was 5 and found out the plastic balloons on the birthday cake were not icing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Serephim Posted March 27, 2008 Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 My sister bit into a hersheys bar and saw 4 little maggots nestled into the chocolate having a sex party Nestle sent us free chocolate bars, but i dont remember if they ever ate them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duckythemutant Posted March 27, 2008 Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarthFettDude607 Posted March 27, 2008 Author Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 lolz good timez... i remember Do you remember... when you were young? When you could name the things we ran from? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ligar Posted March 27, 2008 Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 I ate something that looked like a brownie. It wasn't a brownie... It was some weird cake which the taste NEVER left my mouth. I couldn't eat anything else in fear of vomiting... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarthFettDude607 Posted March 27, 2008 Author Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 I ate something that looked like a brownie. It wasn't a brownie...It was some weird cake which the taste NEVER left my mouth. I couldn't eat anything else in fear of vomiting... I had a similar experience. Mistook a piece of gingerbread for a brownie... it was quite literally pure gingerbread. I don't know how many of you have ever had straight up ginger, but it's like sampling a car tire in mid-June at a gas station. Smells about the same as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rael0505 Posted March 27, 2008 Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 ^ I agree. My sister and dad baked some gingerbread cookies once and left them lying on the counter. I took a bite and was mortified by the strong taste. I washed it down with some expired milk. Expired milk never tasted so good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ligar Posted March 27, 2008 Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 Once, I bit into a strawberry, and spiders came out. I ran out of my grandma's backyard, spitting, screaming, and hating EVERYONE AND EVERYTHING. XDDDDDD Dammit! Still doesn't beat "steak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duckythemutant Posted March 27, 2008 Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 XDDDDDD Dammit! Still doesn't beat "steak" Whoops :/ ....I changed it. RoyBizoy: you're damn right you quoted me on that. i may not post, but that doesn't mean you can copyright my anecdotesDuckyTheMutant: <.< it was a memory lapse DarthFettDude607: lolz ducky does to roy what family guy does to the simpsons Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steven M Posted March 27, 2008 Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kain Posted March 27, 2008 Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 One day, I opened a ketchup bottle and noticed that ketchup smelled horrible. So for whatever reason I proceeded to mix in orange juice, mayonnaise, and god knows what else to a near-empty ketchup bottle. And from about half a foot above the bottle I took one sniff and immediately went into dry heaves. The worst I've actually eaten was various products (crackers, cereal) with sugar ants in/on them. Sugar ants really aren't that bad. Like a mix between metallic and cleaning products taste. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duckythemutant Posted March 27, 2008 Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 they're living breathing ORGANISMS! I can never see myself eating something that's still alive XD Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pheonix Gamma Posted March 27, 2008 Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 Every day at my school's cafe, there are pancakes. Sometimes they have chocolate chips. Sometimes they have blueberries. I hate berries. But the way they're made, you can't tell the difference. Are they blueberries or chocolate chip? I can't tell. So every day I get pancakes and poke at them to try and find out. I'll think I finally got chocolate, then find out it's blueberry and start gagging uncontrollably. Fucking hate blueberries. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
USC Posted March 27, 2008 Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 One time when I was 6, I was (trying to) paint. I had a glass of orange juice next to my mixing cup. I reached back and grabbed one without looking, chugged it and...well, my mouth was rainbow-colored for days. Then I did it again last week because I'm an idiot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duckboy Posted March 27, 2008 Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 My friend has had two wonderful chili experiences as Steak n' Shake. The first time there was a small piece of glass in it. The second time there was part of a rubber band. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spike Posted March 27, 2008 Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 One time I boiled a bunch of rice to eat with some steak and it had like, a million ants in it. Then when I was little I was getting some Captain Crunch and there was a spider in it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DimensionWarped Posted March 27, 2008 Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 Every day at my school's cafe, there are pancakes. Sometimes they have chocolate chips. Sometimes they have blueberries.I hate berries. But the way they're made, you can't tell the difference. Are they blueberries or chocolate chip? I can't tell. So every day I get pancakes and poke at them to try and find out. I'll think I finally got chocolate, then find out it's blueberry and start gagging uncontrollably. Fucking hate blueberries. Oh you can lick the sweatiest part of my balls. Blueberries kick ass! On the mildly off-tangent but still appropriate to the topic note: When I was about 9, I put a boiled egg in the microwave for 5 minutes and bit into it. I almost died. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nitemare Posted March 27, 2008 Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 We just recently starting selling coffee syrups at work, when the stock arrived for some reason they had sent us a crate of beef bovril as well. (No idea why or how, we've never needed it.) I figured I'd make a latte using a syrup shots worth of beef bovril just out of interest, not expecting it to be too bad, and I can honestly say it's the worst thing I've ever tasted, there's no way I can describe what it's like. Also got all but one of the staff to try it, none of them even managed to swallow and two ran off to throw up. So yeah, that was a pretty stupid idea. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarthFettDude607 Posted March 27, 2008 Author Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 [qimg]http://img442.imageshack.us/img442/5781/roflcakeqt7.png[/qimg] <3 F@NBOY$ Wish DeWitt would spend as much time on his writing as he does on his art though... Anyway, My sister told me about a time she was at her friend's birthday party... they bought some rice krispies treats and bit into them. Apparently some of the packaging glue and shit they use had melted off, because she recalls having to chew a ridiculous number of times before she was able to swallow it, plus it tasted slightly like pool water. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TRD Posted March 27, 2008 Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 Candy pancakes... We were so excited. These are pancakes with chocolate and candy pieces inside, impaled on a lollipop, and drizzled with opaque blueberry and boysenberry syrup....... It was terrible. Omg, thank you for saying so, I was at IHOP about 3 weeks ago, and I was DYING to try those things, but then I held off on doing so after remembering a similar incident involving a Friendly's Specialty shake in which name I can't remember. Was it just too fucking sweet, or just plain nasty? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spike Posted March 27, 2008 Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 IHOP makes me want to barf all together. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slingerland Posted March 27, 2008 Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 IHOP makes me want to barf all together. Blasphemy!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VectorSatyr Posted March 27, 2008 Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 IHOP makes me want to barf all together. I <3 their omelets. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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